The American Heritage® New Dictionary of Cultural Literacy, Third Edition defines chivalry as:
The methods of training and standards of behavior for knights in the Middle Ages. The code of chivalry emphasized bravery, military skill, generosity in victory, piety, and courtesy to women.
As far as I am concerned, chivalry is represented in the ideals of sacrifice, honor, loyalty, justice, respect, and courtesy towards women and our fellow men. For chivalry to be truly dead, all of those words that define it would have to be untrue and retired.
Chivalry is about sacrifice, be it great (the giving of ones life for their country) or small (a simple gesture of holding a door so that someone else does not have to). Personal sacrifices that have no direct return, save respect and honor, to the one who made the action.
One cannot describe chivalry without properly talking about honor; for honesty, fairness and integrity are the key parts of it.
Loyalty is a trait that used to be a key part of the world, but has since fallen by the wayside. Be it professionally (staying the same company for most of one's career), in friendships, (treating friends more like family), or marriage (staying loyal to your spouse), Loyalty in all of these areas, has seen a decline in recent history. To value loyalty and to exhibit it, is a rare trait, and truly exemplifies chivalry.
Those who seek truth and justice in an honorable manner are chivalrous.
So long as there are just causes for people to believe in and fight for, there will be chivalry in the world. As Charles Kingsley said "Some say that the age of chivalry is past, that the spirit of romance is dead. The age of chivalry is never past, so long as there is a wrong left unredressed on earth.”
As in all things in life, everything has a place and a proper manner in which to handle situations. Chivalry is about handling those situations in a respectful manner, with resolute and honorable intentions. Being chivalrous is not as black and white as it might seem though. Sometimes it calls for hard decisions that could hurt or affect others. In these situations, chivalry calls for doing the right thing with respects to all those involved.
And now to the most familiar definition. In today's culture, chivalry seems to be attached more to a male's courteous treatment of females. The lack or decline thereof, leading to the said "death of chivalry." Plenty of people take offense at chivalry, and site that women are capable of doing things for themselves, and do not need men to act in such a way. In this day and age, women have the rights and capabilities to take care of themselves in every fashion. That does not, however, mean that there is no reason that chivalry cannot exists.
To me, chivalry is not about superiority, sexism, or condescension. It is about politeness, respectfulness, and manners. It is about honor for oneself and showing others common courtesy. The essence of chivalry is the golden rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Chivalry is not done in return for any form of favor, nor is it something that should be expected. It can be, however, appreciated and admired in another person.
A portion of the population would say that such chivalry is a weakness. They think that by lowering ones self in service or kindness to a female gives the latter more power. To the contrary I think that efforts and showing of respect, does not mean that the male is a push over. One can be chivalrous and still maintain their own strength, backbone, and masculinity.
But as I've stated above, chivalry is something more than manners. While it is what most people associate with chivalry, it is not limited to just the courtly treatment of the opposite sex.
Sacrifice, honor, loyalty, justice, respect, and courtesy towards women, i
t is all of these things together that make up chivalry.It is true that it may be harder to tell acts of chivalry in this day and age, but that does not mean they do not exist.
No, chivalry is not dead. It might be an endangered species, but it is far from extinct.
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